Guilt

Guilt can be a funny thing.

Guilt can make you do things you wouldn't normally do, it can keep you from doing thing we really want to do. You can feel guilty even if you did nothing wrong. The cognitive therapy approach says that guilty comes when we THINK we have wronged or caused harm to someone. We blame our selves for someone else misfortune. 

Feeling guilt for something you had no control over is a bad thing. It destroys you... From my own experience when you are constantly feeling guilty you start to have heath issues. Your anxiety greatly increases, you lose weight, because you can't eat.  You beat your self up all the time, you avoid people because you think they judge you for what you have done and it tares you apart to know that you have hurt them. All these things can destroy you, but there are way to stop feeling so guilty. 

Before I discus someways to to stop feeling guilty i want to be clear that small amounts of  guilt are good for you. when you feel guilty about a bad grade, or punching a hole in the wall because you were made those are good things to be guilty about. Why? Because the guilty you feel from those will spur you to correct your behavior. When you feel bad about your grades, you are more likely to put more effort in to studying, and being more prepared for the class.  

Now how you can stop feeling so guilty: 
First evaluate what happened. Did you make the best decision that you could with the information you had at that time? Did you try your best? Did you do what someone you hold in high regard would do? Yes, then you did good. Tell your self you did what had to be done, and you aren't the terrible person you have MADE your self out to be. No, then continue reading... 

Second If you feel bad about something you did that dose not involve some one else, evaluate why you feel bad. Write out why and where you think you you went wrong, how you got there, and then come up with a game plan as to not do it again. this will give you a goal, a sense of hope and problem solving. 

Third If you think you have hurt or wronged someone, go talk to them. This one is the most important i think and probably the hardest. As humans we tended to hate owning up to our mistakes or the mistakes we think we have made. When you go and talk to the person, it dose many things. One it lets you know if you really did hurt or offend them. Two if they forgive you then you are more likely to forgive your self. Three talking about it and laying everything out does wonders for your self. 

I know this is not a typical entry for me, but I hope it helps you, even if it makes you realize you are not alone in your guilt. I don't you struggle the way I have. 

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Disclaimer: I am NOT a psychologist NOR am I an expert on this, these are only my thoughts, and experiences. I used psychologytoday.com for some the information.