This week I took a trip with trey and his mom, to his grandparents. He and I went to DC for two days. I learned so much, about my self and him, our nation, animals, and his family. I'll post pics later. We went to the national zoo, and American history museum. I took the metro, ugh that made me motion sick. We watched the sunset next to the Washington monument. I was a wonderful week over all. I am very thankful they let me tag along.
Tuesday, March 15, 2016
One year ago, the day started like a normal Sunday, church lunch and church again, that night when I got home I was called, in to my parents in to their bed room, I knew something was wrong. They told me I was not allowed to talk to Trey, again. If I did they would pull me out of school, I'd be grounded. I was devastated. I had been dating trey for only 2.5 months, but knew he was the only person I wanted to date, and be with for the rest of my life. I remember being so upset. For the next week I cried everyday. I wanted to tell him, and talk to him, hug him. That week was the worst week of my life. Even now just writing this I'm getting ready to cry... I would see him in the halls at school and yearn to tell him what happened, and how I felt. But I was stuck. Soon I started sneaking around my mom. I would pass notes, I would a mutual friend a letter, a teacher would pass them for us, she encouraged me so much that semester. We had a class together, I'd sit in front of him and use my tablet to watch him, he would try and use ASL, but knew so little. But I was thankful for the effort. He knew how to say "I love you", and that was enough.
Thinking on that week and those that followed, I remember the pain then numbness I felt. I was mad, I was guilty, I couldn't eat. However now I am not, I'm not mad at my parents, I don't feel guilty, and I've started getting hungry (it's the weirdest feeling) I'm no longer upset with my parents for what they did, I understand they were trying to protect me, and do what was best for me. I love my parents, and my sister's, and I know they don't think I do, but I do. They don't like the choices I've made, and that's ok, they have the right to be mad at me and upset, and I still love them. And I know they at least a small piece of them still loves me.
As much pain as I went through, what I got on the other side was worth it. I got an amazing man who loves me, through everything, he is willing to be in uncomfortable situation to make me happy, he does what ever he can to make sure I'm happy. It hurts that my parents, still don't accept that he and I are together, and think I've made a big mistake. I hope that one day, they will accept it, and we can be happy together again.
Tuesday, March 1, 2016
As kids we play dress up
We find our parents old clothes and costumes and dress up and pretend to be older, or something we are not.As I have grown up i have not stopped "playing" dress up. Only now i dress up nice and professionally for work on occasion. It makes me feel better and gives me a confidence. A pair of heels, a nice skirt, cute blouse, braided hair and make up on point. Gives me the confidence to take o the world.
Yesterday, I had a bad day, nothing seemed to be going great. So today I determined that today was going to be good, I got up on time, and got all dressed up. And so far its been a good day :)